"Is it well for your soul? Will it be well with your soul?"
He talked about how we would be returning to a world of distractions, where we would be thrown all kinds of opportunities to forget what the Lord has done for us. We would forget to trust in the Lord's plan for us, and wuld doubt His goodness. He charged us to write it down, set a reminder, do anything to remind you to ask yourself "Is it well with your soul?"
The night I set an alarm on my phone to go off every 15th and 30th of the month at 12:00 PM. The first few months I was faithful to text my fellow missionaries when I would receive my reminder. I would ask the question and we would all reply with a resounding yes. The trip we had just taken was still fresh in our minds. Months past, and my texts to others faltered and eventually stopped, but I still received the reminder. I would ponder the question and come to a yes or no answer. The Lord would convict me and it would cause me to come face to face with my own shortcomings.
Well, this past Sunday was the 15th, and faithfully my phone lit up with the six simple words that have convicted and comfored me in times past. "Is it well with your soul?" My eyes glanced over the words, but my soul did not respond. I turned off the alarm and looked away from convicting words that my spirit did not want to hear. I looked up from my phone to face my fears and shortcomings alone. I have been bearing the weight of my sinful, imperfect life on my own, and I have had no time to ask if it is well with my soul.
I wont bore you with details of my failures and shortcomings, but recently I have been driving myself into almost panic attacks because I have been trying to take control of my life and I have not been seeking the Lord. Brothers and sisters, I come to you honestly saying I have been neglecting the Lord and trying to live life on my own. This reminder came at a time that I wasn't ready to face the Lord.
I decided that God could wait for me, I had no time for Him.
He decided differently.
This morning, I walked into staff devotions at the school I am interning at and one of the teachers was giving devotional about straying from our shepherd. She talked about a sheep named Shrek that wandered from his shepherd and lived in a cave for six years before wandering back. When Shrek returned he had grown fleece that weighed more than 60 lbs. The story ends with Shrek being sheered, which was better for his health anyway, and returning to the watch of his loving shepherd.
She mentioned that sometimes, we can hide from our own shepherd, and we end up bearing the weight of the world on ourselves. She had pieces of paper with this Scripture:
Matthew 11:28 - "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke i easy and my burden is light."
On the paper is said to write down the burdens that you're carrying unnecessarily. I decided to be honest and started writing. Before I knew it, half of my page was full. I looked down at all of the burden htat I refused to give up to the Lord and felt like weeping. But, this time the tears were not out of self-pity, but of realization of just how far I had wandered from the Lord. I was so worried about all of these things, and instead of trusting the Lord I held onto doubt.
And it was then that she played this song:
And it was then that I realized this was the Lord trying to wake me up. Every failure, frailty, stress and uncertainty that weighed me down came off of my shoulders as I laid them at my Father's feet. I just needed to let go of pride and realize my Father wanting me to trust in Him. He is the only one who can give rest.
Friends, I write this as a reminder for myself and for those of you in doubt right now. His burden is light, he is our loving shepherd.
I will simply ask you, and request that you ask yourself:
Is it well with your soul?
Always,
Christina
